36/365: my sky
i love what he wrote about my sky!
Your sky
The ocean sky echos its temper,
Grey when stormy,
Blue when calm.
The mountains' skyline,
brings out their magnificence,
elicits their splendor.
Your sky faithfully reflects you,
Well organized in squares,
with all that softness
and beauty inside.
35/365: i need water
to be near the water -- whether riding by it, or reading by it -- is where i long to be. i dream of water, often. it goes that deep, for me.
32/365: still falling
i walk around these days, my feet not quite on the ground. i see the ground, i even see my feet on the ground. i see seeds and plants and petals fallen on the ground. but i? i am mid-air. it feels good to be suspended this way, not quite sure what will happen next, but willing to let myself go all the way, wherever this lovely breeze shall take me. i have given in to Life, i am not even trying to control it. sometimes, when i get scared, i try a little bit to control. but i quickly realize that i am not in the driver's seat, and i let go again. trusting. trusting Life.
and i know, as i even told a complete stranger the other day, i can do this, because i KNOW that i can take care of myself. i am fine. i will be just fine. no matter what happens. i am fine.
and so i let myself fall, love ... happily, easily, fully.
30/365: the second one
i am out of the loop on what MOBS means ... but it rhymes with gobs. and that's how much love i feel from my friend-since-15 danielle. she gave me a gorgeous, solid, heavy silver pendant for my big birthday last year. which i loved more than any jewelry i've had in ages. then a month or so ago, i lost it.
danielle was leaving the city with the jewelry store, and moving to argentina. i asked her if she could get me another one, since i loved it so much, and i'd of course pay her back. or pay the store directly.
she would have none of it. she didn't want to punish me for losing the necklace. and she oh so generously BOUGHT ME ANOTHER ONE! i could hardly believe it. that's the kind of gesture a mom makes, not a friend. but she said she learned from having gotten in trouble as a kid for losing things, that she never wanted to make others feel badly in that way. so she got me a new one, and mailed it to me. and i wear it every day just like the one before.
but this one means even more to me than the first one did. a symbol of how great love can be, between dear friends.
28/365: throwing dreams
preparing properly for biking in italy this september: i make sure i stop on my rides these days to sip cappucino, people watch, and throw my dreams into space.
27/365: friends. the elixir of life.
sometimes all it takes is just one sip of a friend's words to make all right with the world.
23/365: going there
travel in this century is a time-warp, and thus a brain-warp. it makes only some sense. it's a bit like dreaming.
20/365: seeking light on a rainy january day
stuck inside in an all-day meeting. stuck inside on a rainy winter's day. stuck inside my head with stories that seem true but are not! ... dear universe, may i learn not to believe my stories! may i see the truth always, or at least more quickly than i did today.
19/365: to hear clearly
sometimes it's much less clear, which way to go, what to think, what to do, how to feel. this is the time when it's most important for me to have quiet time, to allow space to help me be clear and hear what i need to hear. busyness keeps the knowing at bay. slowing down, to stopping, and listening to my heart helps me see my path, and i then know in which direction to point myself.
18/365: graffiti love over 50
before i arrived, he carved a heart in the bathroom wall with the only sharp object he could find, a bottle opener. said, i have something for you ... you will find it in the morning light. and lo and behold, while soaping up in the shower today, there it was!
17/365: trust
i'm being told i can trust my open heart. hell, i tell other people that all the time!
but when it actually comes down to it ... it is not as easy as it sounds.
we have all been hurt. and we don't want to hurt others.
so we close. close our hearts. to protect ourselves.
but when we shut down this most important energy source, we shut off ourselves and others and the whole world from this vital, creative, joyful and free energy which has the ultimate power to salve and heal those hurt places inside.
so, i keep watching myself. oh, just there, i closed my heart! or oh, last night, i was afraid ... and consciously reopen. speak and act from my heart, again and again. this is my current learning, and my current practice. and, my current healing.